OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
