my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
