so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
