she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
