Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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