I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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