those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize