Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
