my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
