About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Randomize
