All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
