when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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