I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize