i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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