I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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