so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'm getting married
To pizza
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize