My brain says no but my pants say off.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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