i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
