So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
