You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
smell my finger.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
