Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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