I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
