Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Randomize