ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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