My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
