I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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