i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
