so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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