All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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