that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
