And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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