You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
