glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize