no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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