You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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