Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
