im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
