It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
