Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
