i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Randomize
