Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
