I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Its about making memories worth repressing
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
