went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
