Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
