Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
