YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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