There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
