I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Dick very happy bro
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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