i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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