Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
