If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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